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The Worst Game You Can Imagine (or fun with train wrecks)

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Soulfinger
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The majority of the posts here focus on improving our grasp of the craft and understanding of the industry, but just for fun, how about we go ahead and do a KS-style pitch for the worst games that we can imagine. After all, the bad ideas that we try to ignore may prove at second glance to be an avenue toward a more fruitful realization.

There are a few modest rules:

-- Train wrecks are preferable to crudeness or outright awfulness, which is to say, try for a game idea so terrible that people would feel compelled to suffer through a session of it for the novelty. For example, break dancing to save a community center versus something endorsed by NAMBLA.
-- No licensed properties. It's just too easy to do Sanford and Son but with the characters from The Hunger Games with dating sim elements featuring the cast of Saved by the Bell.
-- Feel free to rant a little and explore everything that game designers do wrong, industry foibles, or your own pet peeves. For example, "The most unique thing about my game is that it has zombies in it, and each $40 game will come with 100 unique, high detail plastic miniatures (we're just waiting on a quote from China)." Just try not to knock specific individuals or organizations.

Do your worst!

JewellGames
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Pet peeve

Pet peeve: Shirts, hats, mugs, or pins as stretch goals.

MarkJindra
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Rampaging Robot Ninja Dinosaur Space Pirates [RRNDSP]

Rampaging Robot Ninja Dinosaur Space Pirates

In RRNDSP you and up to 15 of your closest friends take on the role of time traveling protectors of future. Your goal is to stop a rogue time traveler from unleashing his Rampaging Robot Ninja Dinosaur Space Pirates on the past. Can you stop him from saving JFK and winning the war in Vietnam? Your future depends on it.

Combining only the best game mechanics such as Player Elimination, Deck Building, Role-and-Move, Worker Placement, Press-Your-Luck customizable dice, over 300 cardboard counters, 50 plastic miniatures, 20 game boards, and a not so unique Legacy system. This game will bring you hours of enjoyment.

And with our booster pack repeat purchase model and subscription online magazine ready to take your money we will introduce monthly expansions where you can dump your precious expendable income until we eventually drop support for the game or decide to release RRNDSP 2.0. Complete with a purchasable upgrade pack.

And be sure to watch for our licensed products such as RRNDSP Dicemasterz, RRNDSP HeroKlix, and a complete line of iPad and Android apps so that you can take the game from the tabletop right onto the bus you ride to work every day.

Don't forget to grab your RRNDSP hats, hoodies, at Think Geak.

Play Time: 8-10 hours (or more) Age: 18+ (may contain small amounts of thc in the hemp based card stock) Players 1-16

Stop by our booth at PAX and yell "Get your hands off my time machine you damn dirty rampaging robot ninja dinosaur space pirate!" and we will sell you a lapel pin that is only available at the show. Or at PAX east, or at SXSW. Or on eBay. Or from the back of a van on Pike street.

=M=

kos
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Totally Unique Fantasy TCG

Take things to the next level with TUF-TCG!

In this game you build a deck of cards from three Unique Fantasy races including orks, elves, and humans. Battle it out with your friends to be the last man standing.

This game is totally not a MTG wannabe. It is Totally Unique with breakthrough mechanics requiring you to use energy points to play creatures, spells, or interrupt your opponent.

Check out the Awesome cards I made using artwork that I found on the Interwebz! Of course that's just for demo purposes, and it's Totally not copyright infringement. Back our kickstarter today so we can pay for the 286 Totally Unique Fantasy images we need to publish the first booster pack.

Soulfinger
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JewellGames wrote:Pet peeve:

JewellGames wrote:
Pet peeve: Shirts, hats, mugs, or pins as stretch goals.

SHIRTZ!!1!

A tabletop game where determining outcomes is as easy as changing your shirt from acclaimed designer, Reiner Knish.

Shirtz!!1! comes with over two dozen unique and quirky t-shirts that players wear to determine outcomes and the attributes of the 14 character models. It's not just what shirt you are wearing though. A player's sleeve values interface directly with the sleeve values of adjacent players, and hidden bonus modifiers have been printed on the inside of each shirt. Not to mention the mystery penalty scores printed on the back. On top of all that, an assortment of hats and pins mix things up with further apparel-based modifiers. Additional shirts, hats, and pins (maybe even mugs!!!) will be unlocked as stretch goals.

Mix it up! Each turn, players may exchange their shirt for one from the common pile or swap with another player. We've retained many of the innovative mechanics from our previous offering, MENSA-endorsed party game, "Whose Underwear Am I Sniffing?" and "These Socks are of Inferior Material," which won the Kennerspiel des Jahres award.

All t-shirts are made of super high quality polyester denier yarn twill weave (some substitutions may be made for 4mm polyster hex mesh material). They are water repellant, fire retardant, and negate hostile magic. We suggest dry clean only to ensure the longevity of the garment. Due to our unique outsourcing methods, some garments may be recycled from used apparel and may include evidence of precious wear, printed slogans or logos, and slight stains or discolorations. Shirts are available in Women's Small and Men's XXXL only, and each game box will include a random assortment of each.

MattPlays
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Another Fkn Zombie Game

Hi!

Thanks for looking at are Kickstarer page. We are two gamers who thought it would be fun to put our drunken ramblings into a game and make some money. We drew some sketches but the final ones will look better because we'll be able to pay for a real artists with YOUR MONEY!! Pledge Now! There are lots of cards to play the game, weapons, survival stuff like bandaged and antibiotics and other things you can think of like in Walking Dead when they are going through someones house or a busted up shop.

Stretch goals!

We're probably gonna get loads of people to give money so this is how we will do it, and raising this much as a first time designer it will be fine

Stretch #1 Upgrade to linen stock (don't know what that really is but everyone seems to be talking about it)

Stretch #2 shirts and glasses

Stretch #3 Enough extra components to push the manufacturing and shipping costs to a point where the project is economically unviable and delivering it will actually cost us money.

kos
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Eye Candy the Card Game

Get ready to start drooling over the mind-blowingly amazingness that is Eye Candy the Card Game!

We've managed to secure one of the best artists in the industry who has worked on two board games, a long running web comic, three AAA computer games, and even contributed to the upcoming blockbuster movie this summer. And he's working on OUR game! This is going to be awesome!!

We haven't really worked out all the rules yet, but this is definitely the right time to get this KickStarter kick started, seeing as how with artwork this good the game is guaranteed to be a hot seller. Backers will even get exclusive access to playtest the beta version.

Check out the amazing artwork at [this link] and [this link] and [this link].

Give us your money now, otherwise we'll keep spamming you with stupendously good art until you cave in. Don't ask about the gameplay, just click on [this link]. You know you're going to, so why fight it?

Tbone
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Make a Kake

Have you ever wanted to EAT YOUR GAME??!?!??!!!!!!!!?????

Open the box and literally eating the game is your FREAKING VICTORY CONDITION????!!?!?!?!?!

(insert infomercial, black and white fail scene that never actually depicts reality) Tired of just playing games that don't satisfy your hunger with silly victory points and hurts your head thinking about your next move? LETS GET REAL PEOPLE.

(are you annoyed with my all caps words yet? wait for it....)

INTRODUCING THE ONLY GAME THAT YOU CAN PLACE INSIDE YOUR MOUTH, DIGEST, AND WATCH SWIRL DOWN THE TUBE IN THE FOLLOWING 24 HOURS!!!!!!!!

make a kake.......

There's only one rule. Eat everything EVEN THE BOX. YES ITS MADE OF FERMENTED GOAT MILK CHOCOLATE..... WOWZA.

BUT WAIT.... theres SMOREEEEEEE!!!

Buy your copy of Make a Kake today and we will include the expansion SMASH A SHMOR where you literally make a fire on your living room table and make SHMORSSSSSS!

Back our kickstarted and we'll give you like these cool things that actually make the game less interested!!!! BECAUES ETES JIST det.... gewd.....

Thanks. oh and the pnp version is in the link bellow.

enjoy.

playtest for playtest.

Dice Tower Approved.

Rhado liked it.

yeah.

kake.

(link doesn't work cliche)PnP version https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5hedvg8t-LI

kos
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Glacial Epochs Party Time

Glacial Epochs is a fast paced party game for 4-8 players.

The game is played in four Epochs representing the sweep of history. Each Epoch takes around 1 to 1.5 hours to play, providing incredible strategic depth as players via over resources, influence, and trade to build their civilization. There are over 60 unique technologies to research and 18 different types of units all with finely detailed miniatures.

At the end of each Epoch, all the players roll 1d20 and the player with the lowest roll is eliminated by the plague. The surviving players continue on to see who can make it to the final Epoch.

Pre-order now to make sure you get your copy in time for your next all-night games party!

X3M
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How about...

How about that perfectly balanced game? O wait, that one is licensed.

***

CardWars

Where you have like 2000 unique blabalanced cards. Each has strong and weak points. So there is always a counter. Very unlike any other card game seen before.

But wait, there is more to it. You can have a deck of 1000 cards! And eventually stack them all up, on your table. How about that folks? That would be an awesome card battle, right?

Purchase them now!

kos
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ALLCAPS THE CARD GAME

ALLCAPS THE CARD GAME IS INSPIRED BY THE HOTTEST NEW TRENDS IN INTERNET FORA.

EACH ROUND ALL PLAYERS SIMULTANEOUS YELL OUT THE SENTENCES ON THE CARD IN FRONT OF THEM. TOPICS INCLUDE "PLACES YOU CAN STICK THAT", "HEAVY METAL IS THE ONLY ROCK", AND THE EVER POPULAR "PS PWNS XBOX"

YOU SCORE POINTS FOR EACH PERSON WHO ADMITS TO HEARING WHAT YOU SAID OVER THE SOUND OF THEIR OWN RANTING. IF AGREEMENT CANNOT BE REACHED YOU PROGRESS TO A SPECIAL YELL-OFF ROUND WHERE INSULTS ARE WORTH DOUBLE POINTS.

PRE-ORDER NOW TO DOWNLOAD YOUR EXCLUSIVE CLIP OF A JET ENGINE ON A 5 SECOND LOOP, WHICH IS AN INVALUABLE PRACTICE AID AND GIVES YOU A VALID EXCUSE FOR IGNORING YOUR PARENTS WHEN THEY TELL YOU TO GO TO BED.

Soulfinger
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DEODORANT: THE LIVE ACTION

DEODORANT: THE LIVE ACTION RPG

Finally, a convention game that we can all agree on! Deodorant can be played at any convention or social gathering and supports any number of players.

OBJECTIVE: Upon arriving at the convention, the players discover that a bomb has been placed by cyberpunk orc terrorist dino-riding cowboys, and the only way to diffuse it is for everyone to apply deodorant and put on a fresh, button-up shirt that is sized appropriately for their physique. Some players may also be tasked with special bonus missions like taking a shower, obtaining a belt, or removing a ridiculous looking costume. The clock is ticking, and the players must complete their objectives before they can enter the convention area.

The game also comes packaged with a bonus DVD copy of Midnight Madness.

questccg
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How about "Exploding Kittens"???

Wait that's already been done: 56 cards and 1 box. Asking price? Only a mere $8,782,571 for your very own custom copy of the game!

That's right, it's now a game for eccentric BILLIONAIRES! :P

Update: The ones who LOVE GOATS! (ROFLMAO)

questccg
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Life of a BILLIONAIRE

A game for the REST OF US... With hookers, charity foundations, and questionable expense reports! Mouhahaha...

Seriously all the old games are so FAR BEHIND. Who wants to be a Millionaire when you can be a BILLIONAIRE?!?!

Explore concepts like: tax evasion, contract fraud, money laundering, etc.

(Feel free to add to this list...) ;)

Soulfinger
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Ode to my Bro

ASIAN WIFE

In Asian Wife, each player takes on the role of a "nice guy" who just can't seem to hit it off with American women, mostly because of those phonies' preoccupation with material things and steady employment. Your goal is to form a deep and meaningful relationship with a super hot woman overseas who hasn't been corrupted by feminism and won't mind sharing your parent's basement with you. Of course, even though your characters are all genuine individuals and free thinkers, they each have to overcome an obstacle on their path to true love, be it morbid obesity, herpes, or being on the no fly list on account of a patriotic gun collection.

Each round, players take turns drawing "gripe" cards that list a complaint about American women, such as their preoccupation with traditional good looks over a man's inner beauty. They then try to navigate the "Relationship Highway" that leads to the airport and a two-way flight to Asia. Additionally, players try to match up email responses to the messages received from their Asian lovers, while attempting to discern which messages are actually from Nigerian scammers or a male serial killer in Arkansas (already got him a score of 20). Make critical choices, like whether to doctor your photographs, exaggerate details, get tattoos of Asian "symbols," or demonstrate your worth using the DENNIS system. The player with the highest Misogamy, Creepiness, and X-box Achievement scores at the end of the game, wins! It's all the fun of Mystery Date for the "dud" date depicted in said game.

A future expansion will allow up to two players to take on the role of the Internet serial killer posing as attractive Asian women to lure in victims and/or an American "Feminazi" who will do anything possible to crush the player's hopes and dreams by pointing out their inadequacies and offering constructive criticism for how to better relate to women.

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