Seeking feedback on sell sheet

Nice job on the grammar! Kind of refreshing after some of the edits I've done lately.

"Achieving critical corporate goals will earn you bonus Gold Stars, in addition to weekends off." I'd drop the comma, which would usually be included there to express contrast, like ". . . bonus Gold Stars, or death!" "Weekends off" should come first, as you should be building up to those super exciting gold stars.

-1 point for using "irreverent." A favorite word for pitching card games about strip clubs and donkey punching, usually equates to "tasteless."

"Changing goals, disruptive boss events, and other players' actions make the game unpredictable, and players have to react to these changing conditions to find a path to victory." Sweet! I love that you got "players'" right. Sorry, it's just that the last thing I edited was a chapter of someone's fantasy novel. Start a new sentence with "Players have to react . . ." Also, consider something more concrete than "players' actions make the game unpredictable," as this defines most games. How do the players' actions accomplish this? Acts of sabotage? Kung Fu treachery? Competition for resources?

Fonts could use a little work. I found the catchphrase a little hard to read on my computer, and increasing the font size on the "typed" memo even by 1 point might help us older folks. BUT nothing worth messing up your layout over.

Anyways, good luck! Looking good. I'd usually find two dozen things to nag about on a sheet like this.