My Rulebook

I think you have a solid rulebook in place. It seemed concise and clear. Most importantly, I felt like I could probably pick up the game and play it fairly easily just based on those few pages.

Just a few things I noticed, other than a couple of small typos:

I was unclear on how exactly movement is supposed to work. It seemed clear that there's some sort of grid, by which positioning holds at least some relevance. But I don't see a speed stat on the monsters? I did go back and find a mention of movement in Combat Actions, but this was not intuitive by heading and I feel like there are all sorts of natural questions about movement that demand its own heading.

I also probably just missed it, but I find myself wondering how to find/pick up new weapons.

Overall, I think it's very well done.

The rules do read smoothly and seem to cover the basic mechanics. I like the fictional narrative interwoven with your introduction at the beginning. Also, it looks like a great intro to D&D/Adventure RPGs; somewhat reminiscent of Descent: Journeys in the Dark.

However, I’m left wondering about a components list… How many map tiles come with the game? Dice? Monsters? Is there a campaign book? If so, how many campaigns? Are there pre-designed character cards? How many fighters, wizards, clerics, and rogues are there? Does the player name them, or are they pre-named? Does the player have any flexibility in growing their character, or are all level 4 rogues exactly the same, for example? Are health points tracked with pencil and paper or tokens? What about potions? Shields? Etc.

Also, if it is indeed intended as a “light” introductory RPG, one mechanic you might consider is, like in Descent, allowing characters to be knocked out (rather than killed at 0 Health). My daughters in particular liked this rule because it allowed for continuing with characters they’d grown attached to rather than just eliminating someone and moving on.

Anyway, sounds like the basis for a fun dungeon crawl. Looking forward to observing your progress. -Tom

One other thought: under the combat mechanics section, you make a special point of describing any hit that does more than one point of damage as "critical," but then don’t seem to do anything with this. Is there any benefit to scoring a critical hit (beyond doing more points of damage)? Perhaps, if it’s rare, the monster or character taking damage could be stunned for a turn upon a critical hit. But without something else happening, there doesn’t seem to be any reason to distinguish a “critical” hit in the rules. You either miss, or hit for one, two, three damage, etc.