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My Rulebook

Okay, I'm putting this here first, in case anyone would like to make any suggestions. I'm open to any constructive criticism from "I hate your art" to "What kind of stupid layout is that?" to "This probably isn't much fun"...

I'm probably going to pull out the Table of Contents.. wasted space, and I want it to fit in 8 pages total as well.

The graphic design is what's known in the industry as "me typing in MS Word", so don't expect too much :) I will have it done more professionally before it ships.

The idea is that it can be understood by people with a minimum of experience in RPGs or fantasy games.

Heroes & Treasure Rule Book (Draft)

Thanks for any comments!

Comments

Oh, and I'm probably

Oh, and I'm probably integrating the first page of this into my Kickstarter page...

I think you have a solid

I think you have a solid rulebook in place. It seemed concise and clear. Most importantly, I felt like I could probably pick up the game and play it fairly easily just based on those few pages.

Just a few things I noticed, other than a couple of small typos:

I was unclear on how exactly movement is supposed to work. It seemed clear that there's some sort of grid, by which positioning holds at least some relevance. But I don't see a speed stat on the monsters? I did go back and find a mention of movement in Combat Actions, but this was not intuitive by heading and I feel like there are all sorts of natural questions about movement that demand its own heading.

I also probably just missed it, but I find myself wondering how to find/pick up new weapons.

Overall, I think it's very well done.

Thanks!

The movement stuff is vague on purpose, but I’ll make it clearer that it’s vague on purpose.

Basically movement is completely free when you’re not in combat, and you barely need to move while in combat.

Not only do monsters not have a speed stat, they have no stats at all other than health and attack die..

Oh, and the new weapons are an event that happens and everyone upgrades and gets descriptions. End of lvl 4 :)

Components and Death

The rules do read smoothly and seem to cover the basic mechanics. I like the fictional narrative interwoven with your introduction at the beginning. Also, it looks like a great intro to D&D/Adventure RPGs; somewhat reminiscent of Descent: Journeys in the Dark.

However, I’m left wondering about a components list… How many map tiles come with the game? Dice? Monsters? Is there a campaign book? If so, how many campaigns? Are there pre-designed character cards? How many fighters, wizards, clerics, and rogues are there? Does the player name them, or are they pre-named? Does the player have any flexibility in growing their character, or are all level 4 rogues exactly the same, for example? Are health points tracked with pencil and paper or tokens? What about potions? Shields? Etc.

Also, if it is indeed intended as a “light” introductory RPG, one mechanic you might consider is, like in Descent, allowing characters to be knocked out (rather than killed at 0 Health). My daughters in particular liked this rule because it allowed for continuing with characters they’d grown attached to rather than just eliminating someone and moving on.

Anyway, sounds like the basis for a fun dungeon crawl. Looking forward to observing your progress. -Tom

treeves3 wrote:The rules do

treeves3 wrote:
The rules do read smoothly and seem to cover the basic mechanics. I like the fictional narrative interwoven with your introduction at the beginning. Also, it looks like a great intro to D&D/Adventure RPGs; somewhat reminiscent of Descent: Journeys in the Dark.

Thanks! I'm very happy with that interwoven narrative too :)

Quote:
However, I’m left wondering about a components list… How many map tiles come with the game? Dice? Monsters? Is there a campaign book? If so, how many campaigns? Are there pre-designed character cards?

I should add a component list. Check.

I have one on my Kickstarter-page-to-be, but didn't put one in the rules.

Quote:
How many fighters, wizards, clerics, and rogues are there? Does the player name them, or are they pre-named? Does the player have any flexibility in growing their character, or are all level 4 rogues exactly the same, for example? Are health points tracked with pencil and paper or tokens? What about potions? Shields? Etc.

One of each (two of each will be a stretch goal). They come unnamed. There's no flexibility in growth. There are health chips to track health, and icons/tokens for potions/etc.

Quote:
Also, if it is indeed intended as a “light” introductory RPG, one mechanic you might consider is, like in Descent, allowing characters to be knocked out (rather than killed at 0 Health). My daughters in particular liked this rule because it allowed for continuing with characters they’d grown attached to rather than just eliminating someone and moving on.

I fudge the whole "death" thing, but if you lose, you can replay the level with the same characters. That said, I typically, when playing, describe the monsters as dying.

Quote:
Anyway, sounds like the basis for a fun dungeon crawl. Looking forward to observing your progress. -Tom

Thanks!

Critical Hits

One other thought: under the combat mechanics section, you make a special point of describing any hit that does more than one point of damage as "critical," but then don’t seem to do anything with this. Is there any benefit to scoring a critical hit (beyond doing more points of damage)? Perhaps, if it’s rare, the monster or character taking damage could be stunned for a turn upon a critical hit. But without something else happening, there doesn’t seem to be any reason to distinguish a “critical” hit in the rules. You either miss, or hit for one, two, three damage, etc.

treeves3 wrote:One other

treeves3 wrote:
One other thought: under the combat mechanics section, you make a special point of describing any hit that does more than one point of damage as "critical," but then don’t seem to do anything with this. Is there any benefit to scoring a critical hit (beyond doing more points of damage)? Perhaps, if it’s rare, the monster or character taking damage could be stunned for a turn upon a critical hit. But without something else happening, there doesn’t seem to be any reason to distinguish a “critical” hit in the rules. You either miss, or hit for one, two, three damage, etc.

Actually, it's the opposite. You can't crit a skeleton.

In the future, there might be more mechanics relating to crits (like an accessory that stuns on any crit, yes), so I wanted to clearly define the term.

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